Δευτέρα, 26 Σεπτεμβρίου 2011

She's just not that into you...yet

So… It’s been a while. It’s ok though, I’m a busy man. Though your education and my spam through this blog is of utmost importance to me, I have other even more important shit to do. Like sleeping for example. Or drinking. Or doing nothing. Stuff that busy and important people like me do. But enough about me... Well maybe not. The purpose of this blog was to write whatever the heck I wanted, so I can talk about me all I want. Plus I have about four more hours to kill here till my flight leaves and not enough educative material for you. So I write some crap too. But anyways, I’d be long gone from this stupid airport when you'll be reading this cause there isn’t any free wi-fi here to upload the article. Let’s move to the case in point now…

Understanding women! I’m kidding, that’s impossible. For now at least. But the article is about them. And their friends. It occurred to me after some time in the field (doing social research ofc) that quite an interesting amount of girls are attracted to the man interested in (banging)  their BFF. For example: I’m doing Amy. Amy’s BFF is Lily. I have a lot more chances to do Lily as well and not some other random girl who doesn’t know Amy. This phenomenon though can be observed on a larger scale as well and not only between BFFs. Inserting that observation in the above example, as long as any girl knows I’m banging Amy, I’m good to go. In short, if you’re banging someone, you’re going to bang someone else just as easily. Just cause you’re banging someone. But that’s not new to most of you I suppose. Even if those of you girls reading this will strongly deny the truthfulness of my words, they are indeed the bitter truth. As I said before though, most of you people already know what I’m talking about.
I’m here to guide you fellow guys in exploiting this theory, a thing which many of you may lack the wits to accomplish. If you are already having a girl there is no need for exploiting. You can proceed as it pleases you. Exploiting is for those of you lacking a girl but want to start this chain of getting one girl after another. Especially getting the BFFs one after another. I don’t know why, but I find a certain sense of accomplishment in that. I suppose it’s because I’m an asshole. But tell me ladies, isn’t at least one of your exes an asshole? The answer is yes. This pretty much means that at some point in their life I’m every girl’s type. And yes my ego is the size of Jupiter. Enough of that though. Let’s get back to exploiting. Let’s say you want people to believe you have girl. But you don’t want to lie about it either cause you’re a good guy and I admire you for that, but as a good guy your future in the girl department is rather slim. Yet there is hope for you too. Begin by talking to the unknown girl you’re interested in –let’s call her Amy- about the girls in your life. Never tell her you’re being more than friendly with any one of them though. Cause well, you’re not. But she doesn’t know that. She will most likely assume you are being more than friendly with at least all of them. Girls tend to do that. The logic behind it eludes me however. Now to justify her assumptions though, Amy, will start asking questions on the matter. Most of them look like this: “Sooo your friend Lexi just hangs around at your place right?” Others though are pretty straightforward, like: “Do you sleep with Lexi? “ The key is to give the vaguest answer possible. Like, “Yes most of the time she just hangs around at my house” or “ It’s really none of your concern who I sleep with, but if you must know, no I don’t sleep with Lexi” which pretty much to the girl’s mind implies that you’re sleeping with someone else. And that if you’re sleeping with someone else and don’t want to talk about it maybe you were lying about Lexi too. But she can’t accuse you of lying without leaving herself vulnerable to the fact that she likes you and there’s where you get the upper hand in the game and you never really had to lie about anything. You were just not being very clear about your personal situation. No real harm done. And that's all folks. From here on you're on your own!

If you’re a girl and you’re still reading this crap and haven’t closed your browser and called me a loser yet, you are either really great and I’m lucky to know you ( if I don’t, I’d be lucky to know you in the future) or I’m paying you. Either way, thank you very much for your understanding and I promise you the next article will be even worse. I did say I was an asshole after all.

                                                                                                                       Mr. V